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Monday, April 20, 2009

Motivate Me Monday! It's Hard To Be A Stay-At-Home Mommy, Wife, & Homemaker

I wouldn't change being a stay-at-home mommy, wife, or homemaker for anything in the world.

But it sure is hard sometimes.

You know, trying to be good at it all. I find myself pulled in so many directions, giving emotionally until I am drained...or just a zombie.


I have to consistently fight off the beast of self-entitlement. The monster of self dominates my heart so many times..."I want," "I deserve," "I need..."

What I need is the strength of Jesus to die to myself and give...be a servant...fully. Oh, and do these things authentically.

I can be a good wife (the wife mask) and a good mom (the mom mask), and even a good homemaker sometimes (homemaking mask), but I don't always do them with an authentic heart that truly is.

Do you know what I mean? Can you relate?

I can fake it, sort of. I can make my husband breakfast, or give him the attention he longs for, but my heart isn't in it. I do it to be good, not because I have the honor and joy of fulfilling a beautiful God-given role.

Don't get me wrong, I do desire to have a cheerful heart and positive attitude in all of the domains the Lord has blessed me with, I just find myself more often then not "checking out" and just checking off a list. Sometimes it's easier to pretend then to be.

In our culture, we don't want to do "hard things." The thing is, it's those "hard things" that grow our character and bring us into a deeper and more fulfilling intimacy with the Lord. It's those "hard things" that will have us looking back with gratefulness rather than regret. And it's those "hard things" that will bring eternal value to our lives and the lives of others.

My motivation for the day? Keep persevering. Never stop. Trust the promises of God.

He made me a woman, a mommy, a wife, and a keeper of my home. He will honor my obedience, and when I disobey or "check out" He will guide me back. He begins softly nudging my heart, knowing and understanding my struggles. If I choose to only wear the mask and neglect my heart attitude, He will pursue me with more might. I am His. I may fail Him, but He will never fail me.

Your Turn!

  • Share some advice, wisdom, practical applications, tips you've learned, etc. that you think would benefit and motivate others.


*Make sure to link directly to your MMM post and then link back here!

By the way, I didn't forget about the contest, I'm just still mulling it all over...


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35 comments:

Sarah said...

I've started using the webiste you have a link to that provides lists. I feel so prepared and oraganized to cross off the to-dos, leaving more time to do the important things- serving my God and family- with HEART.

Gina said...

We are so on the same page-I love the reminder of engaging in what we're doing-working at with heart.

Anonymous said...

I enjoy reading your posts everyday!I can relate to you BIG time with this one! I tend to do things like I am checking off a list instead of doing them with my heart as well! I find that prayer helps me most! I believe when your there in that situation pray right then for God to clear your mind and your heart and to give you what you need to do the task with your whole heart! Hey who said praying was just for certain times! Become a prayer warrier!

Isabel said...

Oh how I can relate! But I would point out a difference: it's one thing doing things without doing them heartfully, and another thing doing them without feeling like doing them. Whilst the first like you said is not a very good thing the second is. It is impossible to feel like doing all our chores, but we do them anyway because it is our duty. That doesn't necessarily mean checking things out from our list.

BUT YES, IT IS HARD WORK!!!

By the way BABY AND MUM ARE SO gorgeous!

Beth in NC said...

Oh girl, I can relate. Even my blogging time is a way of connecting with other adults -- entitlement. Yikes.

Thanks for the conviction this morning. :o)

christinnjon said...

Oh Amen Sarah Mae! I believe you are speaking the heart of every mom!! Especially mine! I want to be devoted to my role, not just "get by". And not just some days. Everyday. Maybe I'm hoping for the impossible, but why not? People chase after what seem like "impossible" dreams all the time. With God, all things are possible! :)

I would like to use yesterday's post for today's motivate me Monday, if that's ok. I think it may help equip some of us! ((hugs))

Jane Blogs said...

I would have joined in, but I'm finding it a bit hard to get motivated today. ;)

Seriously, we've had chicken pox in the house & over a week of disturbed, itchy sleep.

But next week, count me in!

PS~ I found you on the 31DBBB forum & decided to call by since we both write "momblogs".
-although, being an Aussie, mine is a "mumblog" :P
Hope you're finding the program as helpful as I am :)

Debbie said...

Wow! Thank you for being so honest. You said what we all think sometimes. I went to a womens seminar this past weekend and got a refresher on Proverbs 31 and it has given me a new outlook. One thing that I have to be diligent in is staying in the word. When I get dicouraged I notice I have not been in His word. It is so easy to do...

Praying for you to have a blessed week.

Kristin said...

This was great, Sarah Mae!
I look forward to the day when I can be all of those things as well, but I'll take this advice and put it in my back pocket until then. :)

ServinGsus said...

Sometimes the "hard thing" for me is being consistent as a parent. I am working on applying Col 3:23 to my parenting right now. Thanks for a motivating Monday!

momofsixteen said...

I so needed this post and I absolutely love your site. I also found you at the 31 days to a better blog forum. Nice work, and it touched my heart.

Onna said...

Great Post and a wonderful idea!! I will definitely come back and post here again!! It is great to reflect on what motivates us!!

Melissa C said...

Oh I needed this. *NEEDED* this today. Wow. I lost another baby three weeks ago, and feel like it's just hitting me now, and I am wallowing in darkness. I feel like my heart isn't in any of my home, wife, and mommy tasks today. Thank you for reminding me of Christ.

bridgetroll said...

Thank you for this post. I pray every night that the Lord will guide me to be the best mother and wife that I can be and I feel like I was guided here to your blog, to read this.

Thank you for the post and for the links within it.

Laura Em said...

Hi there, I just wanted to say this is a great post. I found your blog through Cath's SquiggleMum blog, and I'm a 31DBBB challenge-taker too. I'm not a mom just yet (married for 7 years) but when I am, I'll definitely look to your blog for inspiration!

I have a blog all about baby names called Nameisms. Keep up the awesome work! :)

Proverbs 27:19 said...

My i.d. tag use to be 'Slowly Dying 2 Self,' so I realize what you are talking about when you said, "What I need is the strength of Jesus to die to myself and give...be a servant...fully. Oh, and do these things authentically."

I have often struggled with the question of, does it really count if I don't want to do it and only doing it because it's the right thing to do.

Thanks for your post, I'm going to be reading it again.

smooches,
Larie

Kyla said...

I can SOOOO relate! Being a stay at home mommy IS hard, but it's the best job in the world! Just think of those little minds you are molding and shaping.

And with the Lord as your strength . . . you can never fail!

Thank you so much for this post!

God Bless you!

Buildeth Her House said...

In addition to my home binder. Cozi has been an online tool that really helps keep me on track!!

Kasey Hunt said...

Great post. I too have the same feelings. Thanks for your words or encouragement.

Sandee said...

Good words. I find that being too busy and wanting to do too many things, makes me not put my heart in it as well. I keep reigning myself back to do less and be happy and willing to do less. so I can do it with my heart.

So sad when I hear one of my little ones say, Mommy, you don't take time to play with us, you are always on the computer! Ouch!

Katie @ 3 Blondes and a Redhead said...

Grrrrrrrreat post. We can only do it all through Christ's strength. It's so hard to feel like we're not doing it ALL very WELL. Especially when the kids are so little. They require so much of us! Thanks for the motivation, girl.

Sarah Mae said...

I knew I wouldn't be alone in this, but it just feels like it sometimes - I am so thankful that I can journey with all of you!

Melissa C., my heart cries for you friend. Oh how I wish I could curl up beside you with a warm cup of coffee and lighten your burden. I am praying for you and here if you ever want to talk or need a shoulder to cry on - even if it is through a computer!

MamaHen Em said...

It such a hard job and yet when I know that I've done it right, when the day has been perfect, or moments have been perfect, it's so rewarding. Oh who am i kidding, it's rewarding no matter what kind of day it's been when I peek in on the chickies after they are asleep and their little eyes are closed tight. I couldn't ask for a better life. Even on the hard days. Thanks for the reminder today :)

His Honeybee said...

Your reading my 'mental' mail!!! This is all stuff that I deal with. It helps me tremendously when I remember Philipians 2:13.

Thank you for your sweet comments on my blog, I just found another one!!!

Your blog is one of my absolute faves. Thanks for keepin' it real.

:D

kirwin said...

Hi Sara,
I linked up, but I'm not sure if my post qualifies. (Please feel free to delete me if it doesn't follow your linky rules.)

I've become very aware of Living Mindfully lately, and I have a new dedication to it. I am taking the time to slow down, single-task, and be present.

Chrs said...

You say this so very gently that my internal spelling nazi didn't even click on when I noticed a typo. Now on to the term paper, that's due tomorrow, that I've worked on almost solely in class. In summary, thank you. You are being used (don't you love it when that's a good thing?)

Mel said...

Thank you for this....so very encouraging. Speaking from your heart encourages our hearts to persevere....thank you so much.

Sarah Mae said...

Chrs - Ahhhhhh.......what was the typo?! Now I have to go check of course!

Heritage of Home said...

Sorry Sarah Mae, I forgot to link back here for the MMM post today. I really am not that good at actually taking a linky. Or whatever it is called and do whatever to the whatever. Thank you for reminding me. Love ya Sister. Looking forward to what the Lord is doing in all our lives!

Laura said...

(Am I allowed to say that I COULDN'T WAIT for Ryan to whisk me away for my birthday dinner tonight because I knew I'd be having one - erm, two - glasses of amazing white wine after a day with two whiny-and-seemingly-constantly hungry-crawling-on-my-legs girls! Being a mommy is HARD I'll tell ya! So, your post was fantastic timing and you are in MY company at least! :) )

Chrs said...

Either you found what I was talking about, or I was entirely mistaken (or I'm presently unobservant). Anyway, that was not the point! I commented to compliment your post, not make you paranoid. ^_^

Suz said...

Thanks for the inpiration! I will have to check in next Monday and maybe share a post myself... we all need a little kick in the "bum" sometimes.. I know I do :)

Lisa @ Stop and Smell the Chocolates said...

Sarah Mae, I think we are so much alike in this way! I am always struggling with the self-entitlement and definitely don't like doing the hard things! I know that God will help me with these things and I will continue to ask Him to work in me.

lynn said...

(smile) I am enjoying this site. I'm in my 40s and I can offer some support on this one. I've been where you are until recently. I lost my only child, (a son) after 27 yrs of caring for him. He was a quad and just one cool kid! I know it seems tough and it is- but keep in mind that this won't last forever. One day you will look back and realize it's over one way or another. It will be so worth it in the end. Your sacrifices today are what will bring you comfort tomorrow. Motherhood rocks!

shopannies said...

great post and so to the point many times I would just love to wait on the sidelines watching when I need to be motivated to get involved