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Friday, April 17, 2009

How To Talk To Your Kids About Sex, Part 3 - Firm Foundation (Plus Questions & Comments From YOU)

How To Talk To Your Kids About Sex, Part 2 Continuted (How)

Six Biblical Reasons Why God Gave The Gift Of Sex


"And Adam knew Eve as his wife, and she became pregnant and bore Cain; and she said, I have gotten and gained a man with the help of the Lord." Genesis 4:1


Just read Song of Solomon...that pretty much says it all! Here's another verse for you though:

"Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant doe [tender, gentle, attractive]--let her bosom satisfy you at all times, and always be transported with delight in her love." Proverbs 5:19

Intimate Oneness

"For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is very great, but I speak concerning [the relation of] Christ and the church." Ephesians 5:31-32

"On your wedding night when you and your bridegroom become one sexually, you will experience the most intimate physical act on this earth. When you taste of the kit-together closeness and experience the melting together of your bodies, you will then have a visual picture of the spiritual closeness that the Lord Jesus wants with you." Paraphrase, Gift-Wrapped By God by Linda Dillow & Lorraine Pintus

Deterrent To Temptation

"Let your way in life be far from her, and come not near the door of her house [avoid the very scenes of temptation]...Drink waters out of your own cistern [of a pure marriage relationship], and fresh running waters out of your own well...Let your fountain [of human life] be blessed [with the rewards of fidelity], and rejoice in the wife of your youth." Proverbs 5


After David and Bathsheba's first son died:

"David comforted Bathsheba his wife, and went to her and lay with her..." 2 Samuel 12:24

Unique Knowledge

"And Adam knew (had sexual intercourse) Eve as his wife..." Genesis 4:1

"The Hebrew word for sexual intercourse is "to know." Through God's gift of sex, you and your husband will receive an intimate knowing of one another that you have with no one else. This special secret between just the two of you will bring an incredible depth to your relationship." Gift-Wrapped By God by Linda Dillow & Lorraine Pintus

Comments & Questions From YOU

"I do want to encourage Moms to take the plunge and have this most important talk!! My oldest is 9 and I waited too long-she heard a GRAPHIC description (not Godly in any way) from a classmate."

"My daughter (not yet 7) has made it very clear that she is having some sort of "romantic" feelings. It wasn't by word of her mouth, but actions I observed...Parents, I'm telling you, I don't know where this is coming from. My daughter is homeschooled and all movies are monitored. There is no tv viewing of any kind (other than parent chosen dvds)."

"I would highly advise Passport to Purity - it not only covers sex, but living in every area of life to honor the Lord."

"What am I most afraid of? The information being used against me! Meaning, I fear that if I give too much insight, curiosity will take over."

"My mom JUST gave me the book "Sex Education is For the Family" by Tim LaHaye. I read through most of the book last night, as it is tremendously helpful in instructing, scripting, explaining, and encouraging a godly "sex education" through life!"

"How do you react if your kids see two people (Sometimes even same-sex) behaving inappropriately in public?"

"...as the mom of an almost 9 year old, to say that they need a complete description of 'how-to' at 8 just REALLY bothers me, and your suggestion to build excitement and expectation of finding out this secret stuff pretty much horrifies me...I feel very strongly that my kids need to hear this from me and to hear it from a Godly, Christian perspective, but they need to know and hear it at a point where it is emotionally and physically appropriate. You need to be tuned in, not on a schedule."

When your three year old asks how people are made: How Questions :)

We're not done yet...come back Tuesday (and Monday, for Motivate Me Monday of course!)

Join me everyday for coffee while we tackle this subject, subscribe here!


ServinGsus said...

For a good recommendation about purity talks with *younger* kids, we bought the story "The Squire and the Scroll" for our son, and have "The Princess and the Kiss" on order. They cover waiting and purity in an allegory form from the days of knights and ladies. It's generated some great conversation with our 5 year old!

Melissa said...

Did you write the poetry that's on your 'blue' blog? Deep, I "get" them. Thanks for sharing your heart. I love when people are real; that's the only way I know how to be.
: }

Robin said...

I like the above books mentioned by ServinGsus, "The Squire and the Scroll" and "The Princess and the Kiss". This is such an important topic that you are covering. I believe that parents need to be engaging their children in godly conversation from an early age about this and many other topics.

Are you talking with your children? You know your children best and I want to encourage you to not be afraid of this topic. The world is full of images that are not godly and you need to help them to understand from a biblical perspective how to process these things.

Helping our children to have biblical wisdom and discernment in this area is our job. We may want to shrink back like the lady in the first post in this series (which is just too funny), but we cannot. Our children will have to depend on us to lead them through the wilderness that is out there and to help them to remain pure.

For further reading on the topic of purity Anna Sophia and Elizabeth Botkin have some wonderful posts on their blog. This link will take you to the category on Girl-Guy relationships

Melissa said...

We have a series of books called The New Learning About Sex series: A Series for the Christian Family.

We have the first two book, and need to get the other ones. The first two are well written. For example, the first book is for 3-5 year olds. The second for 6-8 year olds, and so on.

Anonymous said...

Great insights!

Anonymous said...

Any tips on talking to a little one who has an interest in the sensations that she has discovered in her body? How does one tailor it or approach it without causing shame and yet not endorse it as a regular activity???

Sarah Mae said...

Anonymous, how old is the little one?

I will talk about this on Tuesday...I wouldn't make a big deal out of it, but depending on the age I have a couple of suggestions.

Sarah Mae said...

Melissa, I do write my own poetry...I haven't written for awhile though! :)

Sheryl said...

I am so excited! I started phase one of the sex talk with my 9yr old daughter this weekend. We had already discussed periods but hadn't gone any farther. She didn't know as much as I was afraid she may have heard from her 4th grade friends. AND we communicated which is getting increasingly more difficult. I realized I don't give her enough credit for being a little girl but maturing into a young lady. It seems like this year her attitude is so different toward me and I was blessed by a wonderful mama-daughter experience.

Lisa @ Stop and Smell the Chocolates said...

It is a wonderful gift that God has given to us! I wish that it had explained more in those terms when I was a child.

I actually recently look at The Squire and The Scroll book from a friend - it really did cover some issues that we have not talked to our son about yet, such as how to behave around girls,etc.

Great stuff Sarah Mae!

Anonymous said...

Hi Sarah Mae,

She's five. :0)