I understand why women dress immodestly - cute fashions, attention, even the weather...
I can remember specific arguments I had when I dressed in an immodest fashion (or when I just didn't know). Most of the time I wasn't trying to be seductive or grab attention (although many times I was). Let's talk about some reasons we dress immodestly, and let's get specific, shall we?
*Please know that anything I am saying is not to be judgmental of anyone. I am on this journey with you. Modesty is ultimately an issue between you and the Lord.
Let's be honest - bikini's are super immodest. Here are the reasons I have used myself and heard from other Christian women (let's tackle them):
"I just wear it for the tan."
I have totally used this one! What woman doesn't want to be a bronze goddess in the summer? However, let's get real. Wearing a bikini is so not okay when it comes to being modest. I mean, hello? You can see everything! We know this, so why continue to do it? I think we do it for a couple of reasons, but mainly we would just rather not think about it because if we do, we will have to admit that we shouldn't be exposing our bodies this way. I know for me I find it so much easier to ignore something than have to face it and then live in the light - which is hard! I mean honestly, cute little bikini's are much easier to buy and feel stylish in than the ugly modest bathing suits that are generally out there. Can anyone relate?
"My husband likes it."
I admit, this excuse is one of mine. On my honeymoon I wore a bikini. I convinced myself that because I was somewhere far away and know one knew who I was that it really wasn't a big deal. Plus, my husband like me wearing it (I asked him if I could share that and he said I could). The truth is though, still not okay. If our husbands want us to to wear bikini's (or anything immodest), my suggestion is to sport it for him in your home...for him only! Tell him how much you care about the fact that your body is for him only, and you want to honor him in that. Then, make sure you actually wear sexy little outfits for him so he doesn't feel gipped! We are to submit to our husbands, but our ultimate authority is God.
"I am finally comfortable with my body."
I heard this one from a very sweet young lady who has struggled with body issues most of her life. She loves the Lord and has a heart to live in godliness. However, she believed that because she finally came to a break through in her body issues, she felt like part of her "healing" was to wear a bikini without being self-conscience. It makes sense. But again, we must ask, "What does God say?" God's word is clear that we should be modest and strive to serve others before ourselves - that includes putting our seemingly good intentions aside for the purity of our brothers.
"All my friends wear them."
Peer pressure is so tough! I get made fun of all the time from one of my dear friends because she thinks I dress like a grandma at the pool - and she's right, I kinda do! But only because I haven't found a cute modest bathing suit that I can afford (grrrr...). You know what though, if we find our identity in Christ, we can laugh at what others have to say. I just walk around joking about it myself now!
Showing Cleavage, Wearing Short shorts/skirts, and Immodest Dress in General
"My breasts are too big too hide!"
Okay, I admit, I might be just a teeny bit jealous of this reason. I cannot relate, but I do know that tank tops under shirts are a great way to hide the cleavage, especially for when you bend over. I also realize that most things probably cling to that area, but I say, just do your best to be as "unclingy" as possible. That is all you can do and you are not responsible for doing more than that.
"I just don't think about it."
I think this is probably the most numerous reason women dress immodestly - they just don't realize, or really think about it. I know I can relate - heck, like I said before, I end up going through my closet each year and asking myself, "what was I thinking?!" Well ladies, it's time to start thinking about it. Start paying attention to your neckline - if you see cleavage when you look in the mirror, even just slightly, we can see it too! Same thing goes for shorts and skirts. Keep the thighs away from eyes!
"It's not my problem, if a man struggles then it's his responsibility to turn away."
This reason cuts to my heart because the women who say/think this are probably the women who have been hurt by men the most in their lives. Perhaps they have been abused or uncared for by men. Their defense is rebellion. While it is true that men do have a responsibility to look away, we need to be sensitive to their struggles and be willing to help them out. I love how my sister-in-law Renee put it in a recent comment: "A heart for modesty out of a heart of love for the Lord and for men around us. A heart to see them succeed instead of fail- to live a life of courage and fulfilled destiny instead of a life in slavery to sin." So well said!
"It's too hot outside to dress modestly."
Hey, no one ever said being modest was easy! I quote from The Rebelution: "DO HARD THINGS." Seriously, I know that when it's hot outside it is more difficult, but we still have a responsiblity - God's standards don't change because of the weather.
"Okay Sarah, you have shared these reasons that Christian women have, but what are we to do about them, especially when it comes to finding modest things? Are there any general modesty guidelines?"
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